Stu Trololol is a lineup player for the Charleston Shoe Thieves, and has been with the team since Season 1.


Official League Records

During Season 2, Trololol gained league-wide notoriety for a propensity to steal fourth base in big-game moments. In the first instance of Stu Stealing Home, the Day 26 game against the Hawai'i Fridays, Trololol stealing home in the bottom of the 14th inning resulted in Fridays being shamed. In the game against the New York Millennials on Day 71 of Season 2, Trololol stole home at the bottom of the 8th inning, securing a 6-5 win for the Shoe Thieves.

At the end of Season 4, Trololol was affected by the Alternate Reality Decree, resulting in an increase in star rating from ★½  to ★★½ 

On Season 8, Day 99, Trololol gained a ½ -star in batting and defense due to Enhanced Party Time.

In the Season 10 elections, Trololol received Noise-Cancelling Headphones, becoming Soundproof.

During the Coffee Cup, Trololol played for FWXBC as a lineup player.


COMMUNITY LORE

The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Blaseball Career

Before Alternate Reality

One day Trololol showed up to Shoe Thieves practice with someone else's blaseball rod and wouldn't leave. General Manager and star pitcher Cornelius Games was smitten by their go-getter attitude towards blatsmanship and petty larceny, and moved to have them immediately added to the roster. After discussion with the Umpires and the The Commissioner, Trololol was covered in the requisite amount of goat blood and inducted into the league.

Trololol was also known as the Wet Bandit, for their tendency to attempt to illegally enter empty home bases. Unlike the historical Wet Bandits they were often successful, and were only occasionally foiled by a small child.

A long-time sufferer of performance anxiety, Trololol struggled to bat successfully when watched. Out of respect, blaseball fans shut their eyes in their presence, allowing them to bat free from worry and shame. This had the helpful side-effect of making it easier for them to steal shoes.

Trololol specialized in stealing clown shoes.

Season 4 Feedback Swaps

When asked to comment on the changes to their team caused by Season Four's Feedback, Trololol had this to say in an interview:

"I can't, I just— I can't. I'm not OK. I try to pretend like I'm OK but I'm not. I just— [sigh]... I can't choose my relatives but when I chose the Shoe Thieves they became like the family I chose. Ren, Workman, Doyle, they're gone and this team is in tatters. We try so hard to make sure that the new team members are welcomed, that they're OK. But nobody has checked if I'm OK. I'm not—"

Trololol glanced to the bleachers like they were thinking of making a run for some kind of freedom.

"Blaseball is all the time. It's constant. And I don't stop, I can't, that's not how it works. But this pressure building up inside of me, it's my soul. My soul is screaming and it's being amplified by the stadium, bouncing back onto me. It's louder and more vicious and I feel like I'm drowning in the feedback."

Their final words echoed around the Choux Stadium's empty stands, prompting the interviewing reporter to look up around them. When they looked back down, Trololol was gone and the reporter's loafers were missing.

After Alternate Reality

Alternate Reality Swap

After the Alternate Reality decree passed at the end of Season 4, Trololol was swapped with a Stu Trololol from an Alternate Reality. The Shoe Thieves learned of the change when Trololol, full name Stusan Elistubeth Vannestu Trololol, flew over Choux Stadium in a freshly-stolen blimp. This particular Trololol is a trans woman who speaks with an exaggerated Cockney accent during games and interviews, seemingly to irritate listeners.

Trololol affects a self-described "intentionally obnoxious" persona on the field, habitually taunting the opposing pitcher, the defense, and even the umpires during games. She has been described by those close to her as "an absolute rat-bastard, just like the old Stu" and has seemingly had no difficulty being accepted by the former Trololol's friends and teammates. While in her position as catcher, Trololol often sings "Let Me Into the Blaseball" loudly and off-key to distract batters. Unlike the original version of Stu, she claims that she loves attention and that her actions on the field arise from that. Without prompting, she further added that her attitude "hasn't turned the ladies off one bit."

When asked about her other alternate-universe teammate, Snyder Briggs, Trololol said "Snyder Briggs? Well, they're a right tosser. They toss with their right, yeah?" (In fact, all known versions of Briggs are notable for pitching left-handed.) Trololol continued, "'S'all I know about 'em. Reckon they're from a different universe entirely. Folks say they're always on fire, but I say, not with that pitchin' record, what!" Trololol then laughed loudly at her own joke.

When pressed for details about her home universe, Trololol was coy: "Oh, well I wouldn't wanna to spoil the surprise, luv, but I'll tell you this much: it's got a lot more blimps than this one. Honestly, 's downright disappointing how few opportunities a girl gets for sky piracy here."

Role in the Season 9 Finals

In the final round of the Season 9 finals, Trololol hit the championship winning triple home run, preventing the Baltimore Crabs from ascending and sending them into shame. Shortly thereafter, she faced off against her brother, Axel Trololol, who was then the pitcher for the Shelled One's Pods. When asked for a comment, Stu Trololol had this to say:

What a prize for the winners, eh? In the 5 seconds I got to really bask in it, I was planning on composing a twelve part ballad done entirely in the accent to landmark my achievement. You'll notice I'm not doing the accent anymore. I miss my brother. I miss my friends. I'm still drowning, and I'm so so tired.

Regardless, Trololol's reported exhaustion did seem to not prevent her from leaving the team of interviewers shoeless.

Personal Life

Stu Trololol was born in Chicago to Ashkenazi Jewish parents and is the younger sister of former ILB player Axel Trololol. When the two found themselves on the same field, major natural disasters were reported within 150 miles of the stadium. Trololol has stated in interviews that one of her two biggest inspirations growing up was her grandmother, Dorothea "Dot" Trololol, after whom the phenomenon of trolling is called. Her other inspiration, she claimed, was Starscream from the television show Transformers. Trololol can be recognized by the distinctive smell of artificial watermelon gum, which can linger in a room for hours even after she has departed.

After New York Millennials player and fellow sky pirate Charlatan Seabright joined the ILB, the two became fierce rivals in theft. Trololol has described this rivalry as a friendly one, based on mutual respect and a love for the property of others. The two are often seen either swordfighting on one of their respective airships or taking coffee in one of the many cafés close by the Millennials' stadium

Trololol specializes in stealing blimps and other airships, describing them as "the shoes of the sky, innit". This description prompted Glossip's correspondent to end the interview early.

Gallery


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